Reports reaching FNN indicate that Covenant University is at
it again. This time around, they have passed a directive to all students ahead
of the Brazil 2014 World Cup starting next week to the effect that no student
must watch any of the matches for the footballing festival.
The reason for this strange order by the school management
is that Brazil is a country known for immoralities, and the stadia will be full
of indecently dressed girls and women who will corrupt the morals of the God
fearing students in the school.
When FNN contacted the Dean of Students to throw more light
on this recent development, he also said ‘in addition to the this sanctions, as
long as stubborn players like Cristiano Ronaldo and Mario Balotelli will play
in the mundial, the girls in Covenant University are not safe’.
When asked to explain further, he said, CR7 and Balotelli are in the habit of pulling
off their shirts after scoring every goal to show off their six-packs. Therefore,
this might give this girls wet dreams will make them fall spiritually’.
He also said that the boys where not left out because of the
half-clad and half-mad women who are known to patronize the streets of Brazil.
Hence, Covenant University authorities will suspend anyone
caught watching the World Cup for two months.
Tough love for our brothers and sisters in covenant
University.
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